Giggle Fit
In kindergarten, we read the same book for a month, a couple times a week. The smarter kids (all of one class, half of the other) get bored as shit with the same book, so it's a struggle to make such redundancy interesting with for the kids. This month, it's "Sleeping Beauty" - always met by groans of "Oh, no! 'Sleeping Beauty' again?!" To keep it interesting for the more advanced kindergarten class I have, I told the kids to bring in a version of "Sleeping Beauty" that they may have on their shelves at home, so we can compare the two.
The supplementary version of "Sleeping Beauty" was one of the more interesting spins on the tale I've ever come across, but is more noteworthy for its awkward prose. After all of the kingdom gets encased in thorns by the bad fairy and is unseen for decades:
Perhaps having the whole kingdom encased in thorns is a way of circumventing an alone kiss between the charming prince and his unconscious bitch. Beating off the dragon, however, is in plain sight. That last line - and the angling of the spear didn't help - made me giggle for a bit, which I attempted to conceal by faking a sneezing fit. Six year olds are two smart for that: "Teacher, why do you laughing?" "Uh... No reason. Sometimes I do that. Sorry." Anyway, this is a verbatim transcription, since I asked the genius nose-picker if I could borrow her book. "Yeah. But why?" "Uh... So my friend can read it to his class?"
It's pretty easy to get desensitized to bad English here, especially when, on a conservative estimate, about 95% of the lettering on any given apparel you see on the street is in English. My kid with some learning difficulties wears a shirt that makes me smile - which is great because everything else about that kid is effing frustrating - and I get to see it about three times every fortnight. It's a glorious DIYer, in rainbow colored speckled letters: "MY LOVER IS THE BISKIT." Yeah, mine is too, buddy. Let's hope at least one of us is keepin' it safe, yo.
The supplementary version of "Sleeping Beauty" was one of the more interesting spins on the tale I've ever come across, but is more noteworthy for its awkward prose. After all of the kingdom gets encased in thorns by the bad fairy and is unseen for decades:
Hundred years later, a prince passes by. "What is in this thorny shrubs?" The fairies give the prince a magic spear: "You never come in this palace." The witch turns into a dragon. And she starts to spout fire. "Bad witch, disappear!" The prince beats off the dragon.
Perhaps having the whole kingdom encased in thorns is a way of circumventing an alone kiss between the charming prince and his unconscious bitch. Beating off the dragon, however, is in plain sight. That last line - and the angling of the spear didn't help - made me giggle for a bit, which I attempted to conceal by faking a sneezing fit. Six year olds are two smart for that: "Teacher, why do you laughing?" "Uh... No reason. Sometimes I do that. Sorry." Anyway, this is a verbatim transcription, since I asked the genius nose-picker if I could borrow her book. "Yeah. But why?" "Uh... So my friend can read it to his class?"
It's pretty easy to get desensitized to bad English here, especially when, on a conservative estimate, about 95% of the lettering on any given apparel you see on the street is in English. My kid with some learning difficulties wears a shirt that makes me smile - which is great because everything else about that kid is effing frustrating - and I get to see it about three times every fortnight. It's a glorious DIYer, in rainbow colored speckled letters: "MY LOVER IS THE BISKIT." Yeah, mine is too, buddy. Let's hope at least one of us is keepin' it safe, yo.
posted by Mark Hernandef at 8:50 PM
2 Comments:
My lover is the biskit.
What could that possibly mean?
Yeah. I ran that by a coworker in almost the exact same words: "Does that have a meaning in Korea that I just don't understand?" "Uh, I think it just means that he fucks biskits."
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